• MrSulu@lemmy.mlEnglish
    18·
    1 天前

    I’m a hetero male and often have “interesting” debates with other guys about pride events. The great majority of whom ask where the straight pride is, with some suggesting that they arent allowed. The killer question is always about which rights, freedoms from hate or employability they feel we’ve been denied. The scummiest responses are that all the jobs have gone to ethnic minorities and gay people.

    • Gap@lemmy.world
      7·
      1 天前

      Having a straight pride would be the same as the UK celebrating independence day

  • IninewCrow@lemmy.caEnglish
    81·
    2 天前

    Masculinity is when you can act like an adult without worrying about what other people think of you.

    I was raised by my father … a traditional Ojibway/Cree hunter, trapper and traditional person and my mother … a traditional Ojibway/Cree woman who was more than capable of living on her own. Dad was more man than any male I’ve ever known … he did all the manly things like hunt, trap, fish, travel on land, water, walk, canoe, snowshoe, dogsled, and he could do it all for days, weeks and even months on his own without help.

    But the greatest thing he taught me is to know that there is no such thing as ‘men’s work’ or ‘women’s work’ … sure men are designed to do certain things and women are more capable in other things … but all in all, men can do what women do and women can do what men do … there are a few biological exceptions to the rule but not many.

    He taught me and my brothers that we do the same work with our mother as we did with our father … you hunt and trap and carry heavy things? … you also clean the house, cook food and take care of children … work is work when you are living in the wilderness and no one is exempted from any work because everyone has to work, no matter what the work is.

    When dad was gone for a week or more to trap … mom did all the work of cutting, hauling, splitting wood and gathering water … she even fished, did some light trapping and fixed the house when she had to. When mom was gone from the house, dad took up cooking, feeding kids and cleaning the home and taking care of the children.

    It wasn’t a complete utopia and things weren’t perfect … dad was a terrible cook but he tried … mom couldn’t gather as much food as dad did.

    But they taught us that you have to learn to do any and everything … because if you are ever caught out in the world on your own … you have to be capable of doing absolutely everything for yourself.

    • LadyButterfly she/her@piefed.blahaj.zoneOPMEnglish
      17·
      2 天前

      Thanks so much for dropping in and giving us a your perspective! It’s a really detailed and interesting comment, probably the best that I’ve read today. We are a trans inclusive women’s only community, so ask that men don’t comment ❤️

      • IninewCrow@lemmy.caEnglish
        9·
        2 天前

        I absolutely apologize for commenting … I posted without thinking or reading the community rules … I normally read and post while on my laptop, or PC and a big screen with a browser, I can see and read the community notes and warnings. However, I commented on this using my phone … and these small screens don’t immediately show you the community info or warnings too easily.

        If you prefer, I can delete my comment.

        Otherwise I’ll be more careful about where I post my comments in the future … on a phone app or on my browser.

        • LadyButterfly she/her@piefed.blahaj.zoneOPMEnglish
          8·
          1 天前

          Absolutely nothing to apologise for, it’s an easy mistake to make. I’d really like your comment to stay up as it’s really detailed, interesting and gives great insight into a different background. It’s definitely useful information, and I’m glad I read it.

  • Diplomjodler@lemmy.world
    5·
    1 天前

    It’s the authoritarians that are attacking masculinity by trying to fit it into their narrow minded world view and by denying all the aspects that don’t fit in with that.

  • AlexLost@lemmy.world
    23·
    2 天前

    Masculinity should be about protecting those who need it, not imposing your will upon them. Strength of character used to be important.

  • explodicle@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    7·
    2 天前

    What is positive masculinity? I don’t see any way to say that one gender is good at something without implying the others are worse.

    It seems unimportant to me, like handedness.

    • godfish@lemy.lol
      3·
      1 天前

      I think there are some differences, like not being able to use scissors normally or comfortably writing, especially with wet ink. Also using the same workstation as my right handed colleagues is often annoying.

      Don’t care much for differences of the sexes. But left handedness is a fucking pain.

      • explodicle@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
        4·
        1 天前

        But like gender, these challenges are due to social conventions designed around right-handed people, not something inherently better.

        • godfish@lemy.lol
          2·
          1 天前

          Hmmm. Yeah i don’t know. For example my bar is all built for right handed people, just because it makes more sense for me to bend a little. But wed never bend someones gender to accommodate better to our bar.

    • shawn1122@sh.itjust.works
      2·
      2 天前

      Our precivilization hunter gatherer ancestors saw the role of man as protector and woman as nurturer. It doesn’t mean women can’t protect and men can’t nurture but I think that’s a fair starting point.

      How we define ourselves is important, especially in a society that puts so much emphasis on these gender tropes. Humans have put emphasis on these tropes since the dawn of their existence. The least we can do is have them be associated with positive attributes.

      • ZDL@lazysoci.al
        9·
        1 天前

        First:

        Second:

        Our precivilization hunter gatherer ancestors saw the role of man as protector and woman as nurturer.

        [citation needed]

        Here’s mine: Woman the Hunter: The Physiological Evidence, peer-reviewed and published: https://anthrosource.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/aman.13915 and filled to the wazoo with citations to other papers that dismantle this 1966 myth.

        Note: in view of the first item, this is not an invitation for you to respond. That would be against the rules. This is an invitation for you to update your badly outdated notions of anthropology to something that was actually done with physical evidence after 1966 (which is when this toxic protector/nurturer divide was first introduced).

        • shawn1122@sh.itjust.works
          1·
          1 天前

          Yours is a Western centric / exlusionary stance in my opinion. I encourage review of literature on Indigineous worldview, particularly Restoring the Kinship Worldview: Indigenous Voices Introduce 28 Precepts for Rebalancing Life on Planet Earth. Pertinent to the topic are chapter 6 (High Respect for the Sacred Feminine) and chapter 7 (Respect for Gender Role Fluidity).

          Out of respect to the community I will leave it at that. But when youre ready to take on a more inclusionary / open mindset, I’d be happy to continue the discussion in a more appripriate space :)

          • ZDL@lazysoci.al
            2·
            1 天前

            Since you couldn’t read two very simple words, I rather doubt there’s very much productive conversation we could have on any topic.

  • dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net
    13·
    2 天前

    Positive masculinity is using your strength to lift others up, not hold them down. It’s using your smarts to teach others and let yourself be taught, not to mock people who don’t know the same things you do.

  • RedSeries (she/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    9·
    2 天前

    There used to be a form of chivalry that kinda got close in the past, but it was still rooted in a lot of hierarchy and patriarchy. That’s been eroded away and toxic traits have dominated masculine discussion and practice for a while now. I’m hopeful a sincerely loving and empathetic form of masculinity can become the norm in my lifetime.