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PugJesus@kbin.social to memes@lemmy.world · 1 year ago

Is this viable? Asking for a friend

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Is this viable? Asking for a friend

media.kbin.social

PugJesus@kbin.social to memes@lemmy.world · 1 year ago
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  • neidu2@feddit.nl
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    1 year ago

    Drink some oil as well. Partially to displace the stomach acid, but also to allow for the kernels to pop.

    • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      And salt and butter. No one likes plain popcorn.

      • batman without ears@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Also roll and eat an alloy wrap so you can take the rest home without it getting cold.

      • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        …corpsecorn?

    • DogPeePoo@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      This thread has some of the best medical advice I’ve ever found on the interwebs

      • monsterlynn@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        How is pappcorm formed?

        • "no" banana@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Am i percornate? How does girl become precornt?

          • DogPeePoo@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            with poopcorns

          • HopingForBetter@lemmings.world
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            1 year ago

            Can have “insert-pickle” for taste will touch top od poplxorn kurnls?

    • Event_Horizon@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Would you need oil with body fat rendering?

    • hOrni@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      And shove a stick of dynamite up Your ass. Not necessarily before you die.

      • Chill Dude 69@lemmynsfw.com
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        I heard something about pacemakers occasionally being left in bodies by mistake, and becoming small bombs in the crematorium ovens. That’s gotta be a trip, the first time you hear that shit.

        And then you probably have to get the oven inspected, to make sure the incident didn’t damage the gas lines. And that probably costs at LEAST a few thousand dollars. And probably tens of thousands, if something does need to be fixed. So, like, I’m pretty sure the boss is only going to let one of those slide, maximum, before you’re out on your ass.

        • Qwaffle_waffle@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Or take out each heart and yell Kalima! No way to miss the pacemaker this way I think.

          /S

          • Chill Dude 69@lemmynsfw.com
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            1 year ago

            Now you’re thinkin’.

  • Rolando@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    The body is often “prepared” for the funeral before it is cremated, so tape a couple hundred dollars to your chest with a note asking the preparer to leave your guts intact. Usually an underpaid apprentice does this, so there’s a chance they’ll go for it.

    • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Someone apprentices at crematorium?

      • WhoisJohnGalt@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        An old coworker of mine at some part-time gig went to school and studied “Mortuary Science”. Absolutely fascinated me. He had a second job at a crematorium where he was an apprentice.

        After him telling me that, I realized that I never thought about how someone got into that field. Never really considered someone going to school to do this as a career (which now I realize is obvious, but I never connected the dots).

        Always assumed people working at a crematorium or a cemetery was a cliche old decrepit guy.

  • Senseless@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    Hm. At first I thought this was a Linux meme.

    • summerof69@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      The guy’s face when OP OD’d on Linux Kernels, RIP

  • Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Also maybe see if you can wolf down an entire pickle. The cremator may be a pickle-with-popcorn kind of fella.

    • Chill Dude 69@lemmynsfw.com
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      Is that a thing? I’ve never tried eating pickles with popcorn. But now I’m kinda curious.

      Unless it’s just code for some weird sex act. Then, probably not. I don’t want to lick anybody’s briny dong.

      • variants@possumpat.io
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        1 year ago

        Would you want your kernel popped

        • Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          He wants the oiliest seed, am I right?

        • Qwaffle_waffle@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Gotta ask for consent first, this is discussed on make some noise BTW.

      • Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        No code here, although that’s hilarious.

  • Daxtron2@startrek.website
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    1 year ago

    I would imagine it’s too wet and would boil instead of popping

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Popping is boiling, but you need the area around the kernel to be hotter than boiling. Outside you need oil.

      So really, you’d need to shotgun blast them into your own belly fat to accomplish cremation popcorn.

      Or drink a slurry of peanut oil full of popcorn kernels.

      Jesus christ I’m on a list now

      • Hadriscus@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        I like practical thinkers !

  • JCreazy@midwest.social
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    1 year ago

    Make sure you chug some oil so the popcorn actually pops and doesnt burn

    • scifun@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      And this is the reason for death in the first place.

  • Stern@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Is this viable?

    • Blackmist@feddit.uk
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      1 year ago

      Popcorn pops at about 180°C, and execution by electric chair apparently gets you to 100°C, so no.

  • crawancon@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    THIS IS SOME GOOD SPAGHETTI BROH

  • krondo@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Soooo … Corn ? 🌽🌽🌽

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Actually no, popcorn’s a specific breed of corn. I think. Small enough kernels to withstand pressure longer or something like that.

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