• throwawayacc0430@sh.itjust.works
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    2 days ago

    You shouldn’t commit an insurrection, but if you accidentally stormed the whitehouse and assassinated a politician, you’re gonna need a good lawyer, but if you need great lawyer, contact my law firm. You don’t just need a legal team, you need the eagle team! 🙃

  • scytale@lemmy.zip
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    2 days ago

    “Did you know you can be tracked if you go to a protest? That’s why I use Nord VPN, to keep me safe from viruses that can steal my personal infomation…”

  • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
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    2 days ago

    My Raycon earbuds are great for listening to emergency broadcasts during the total collapse of American society…

    • zaphodb2002@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      No they’re not lol. I bought them because of podcasts and my $20 JBLs are better. The fucking ANC does nothing and they sound like crap.

      • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
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        1 day ago

        Oh, no doubt, lol. I was just making a joke…

        I’ve never seen or heard an ad for Sennheiser, but my wired cans from a decade ago are still my favorites. So glad the Steam Deck has a 3.5, but I did have to get a Bluetooth adapter to use them with my phone.

        • zaphodb2002@sh.itjust.works
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          1 day ago

          Sennheisers are great, I’ve been using their headphones for years. Those and my Audio-Technicas get a lot of love from me.

      • throwawayacc0430@sh.itjust.works
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        1 day ago

        More like:

        Have you or your loved one been arrested by ICE? Contact my law firm… (something something forgot the phrasing). You don’t just need a legal team, you need the eagle team!*

        *We are not liable for constitutional crisis and/or a total collapse of the rule of law

  • Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    “That’s why I’m so excited about WAR THUNDER: THUNDER CHUNDER. I’m a PhD in maths and an engineer but I like to use BRILLIANT to plan my bunker.”

    • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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      1 day ago

      I would have laughed so fucking much if trumps shitty parade was sponsored by war thunder. It was bad enough with crypto sponsors.

    • meeeeetch@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Hey, where else am I going to find leaked schematics of all the hardware that’s going to show up in this upcoming civil war?

      • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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        2 days ago

        I still think that war thunder should introduce alien spaceships. That way we can learn what really is in area 51.

  • crawancon@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    come home to utter loss and sadness.

    come home to the flavor of Simple Rick.

    • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      Robert: “Speaking of murdering kids”

      Sophie: “Jesus Christ Robert”

      Robert: “Buy these products instead”

      Sophie: “ok I guess”

      • DreamButt@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Look at least this way they’re working in the factories to make usless shit instead of out on the streets starving to death

    • andros_rex@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I wish they would release unbleeped versions of those ad transitions sometimes. I wanna hear more about the BlueApron blood sport island

        • andros_rex@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          The troubled teen industry episode does have a bastard hunting down children with his helicopter.

          The grave of that fucker is pretty close too, although vandalism is perhaps best for living bastards…

          • Brandonazz@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            He definitely is. Guy makes mistakes and has bad takes just like everyone else, but his style is to do the script in a “no duh, stupid” kind of comedic tone, with lots of usually justified ribbing. This is a great way to make people enjoy listening to you and to get them to nod along, but it could be better in terms of critical analysis.

  • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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    2 days ago

    And when the apocalypse hits, I’ll be using ExpressVPN to access all the different movies I want to watch without any geo locking!

  • ☂️-@lemmy.ml
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    2 days ago

    i make sure to use sponsorblock on youtube.

    i resere the right of not having to watch ads during the apocalypse.

  • aeronmelon@lemmy.worldM
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    2 days ago

    “When I’m holed up in my boarded-up house defending myself against the looters, I want to be wearing my Mack Weldon boxer briefs.”

  • ahornsirup@feddit.org
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    2 days ago

    Hey, gotta make rent somehow. I’m not going to blame people for needing money.