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PorkrollPosadist [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net to memes@hexbear.netEnglish · 7 months ago

New Trolley Problem Dropped

hexbear.net

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New Trolley Problem Dropped

hexbear.net

PorkrollPosadist [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net to memes@hexbear.netEnglish · 7 months ago
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  • buckykat [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    Unfortunately the beg button doesn’t actually turn the light red it just makes the next phase slightly longer. The truck and the tesla crash together around the baby and promptly burst into flames while you desperately push the button. As they burn, the light changes on schedule and stays green an extra ten seconds for the walk signal.

    • WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]@lemmy.today
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      7 months ago

      Depends. On some intersections, the main road may always be green until either a vehicle sensor or pedestrian cross button is pressed. Depending on various conditions and settings, sometimes pressing can immediately cause the light to turn yellow.

      • buckykat [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        There are a bunch of those main road always green until the sensor or button happens intersections near me. Pressing the button makes them change about 3-5 minutes later. A vehicle triggering the sensor makes them change usually about 1-2 minutes later.

        • WalrusDragonOnABike [they/them]@lemmy.today
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          7 months ago

          Yeah. Its pretty hit-or-miss. it seems pretty rare to find spaces that setup the lights to handle interrupts well. Makes no sense to make people wait longer when the crosstraffic sensors doesn’t sense anything and the interrupts haven’t happened within a very short period, yet that seems the norm around where I live. So I’m always pleasantly surprised when I’m in a more pedestrian-friendly area that does do it correctly.

    • miz [any, any]@hexbear.net
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      7 months ago

      yakety_sax.mp3

      • context [fae/faer, fae/faer]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        there’s only one true way to experience it

        https://www.ebay.com/itm/175704705455

        • miz [any, any]@hexbear.net
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          7 months ago

          the richness and tonality are unmatched who-must-go

          • context [fae/faer, fae/faer]@hexbear.net
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            7 months ago

            a-guy cassette tapes and their consequences…

  • Lurker123 [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    This problem is apologia for the 9000lb truck. Even an alert driver couldnt see that baby in a car designed to have worse sight lines than a Sherman tank.

  • bumpusoot [any]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    Easy, press the button, and there’s a 50% chance the Tesla will malfunction or explode into flames before it turns the corner.

    • retrolasered@lemmy.zip
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      7 months ago

      If the distracted driver hasnt seen a baby in the road why will he notice a red light?

      • Lesrid@lemm.ee
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        7 months ago

        Unlike the traffic light, the truck made for the American market is closer to the monster trucks from the 90s, the baby is completely invisible at the current distance.

        • retrolasered@lemmy.zip
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          7 months ago

          He is also texting if you zoom in

      • CliffordBigRedDog [he/him]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        deleted by creator

  • context [fae/faer, fae/faer]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    forcing the truck to stop

    so the diagram is not to scale and there’s some time here to react. why not just pick up the baby? run up, grab the kid, and lunge back towards the sidewalk. sure, the truck and car are going to collide atop your legs, but you’ll save the kid and be able to sue ford, tesla, and both drivers. given a split second to decide, i think that’s clearly the way to go.

    • FunkyStuff [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      7 months ago

      the baby is made of a very dense material

      • gay_king_prince_charles [she/her, he/him]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        Assume the baby is a frictionless sphere on a planet where g=10

        • lnxtx (xe/xem/xyr)@feddit.nl
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          7 months ago

          pi=4

      • context [fae/faer, fae/faer]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        ohnoes

      • miz [any, any]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        neutron baby

      • PorkrollPosadist [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.netOP
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        7 months ago

        What if we made the baby more rigid?

    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      7 months ago

      The other lane looks pretty clear, continuing to run across the street is probably safer. I’d do the two arm waving over the head “STOP!” motion while also yelling that and looking really concerned. I’m not gonna get hit by a truck myself to save a baby. My life is worth more to me than a baby’s cause it’s mine. Hopefully this would cause the truck to swerve and hit the self driving car. More realistically that baby is dead, I’m scarred for life, also will be deeply disturbed that someone left an infant in the middle of a crosswalk and as a witness, help the horribly irresponsible parents sue tesla and the big truck guy/big truck manufacturer

  • WhatDoYouMeanPodcast [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    Double it and give it to the next person

  • Nobilmantis@feddit.it
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    7 months ago

    Yo why is this not on fuckcars?

  • DavidGarcia@feddit.nl
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    7 months ago

    It’s okay, Elon Musk will personally descend from heaven to save the baby and give it a 5 billion dollar crypto opportunity

  • MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml
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    7 months ago

    Get on the crosswalk, problem solved.

  • Floey@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    Part of what makes the trolley problem work is that it is “on rails” (quite literally).

  • mindaika@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    7 months ago

    The baby is a pedophile, so clearly Elong is a genius hero saint for personally hand building a Tesla to smash it

  • woodenghost [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    Another metaphor for the US election.

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