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Exchange rotisserie chicken for entire homemade pecan pie, and yeah.

You don’t always have to fuck her hard…

Wet socks

Plouton was the god of wealth iirc so maybe him?

I would totally be okay with all of these.

Groovy

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Bunch of dragons with no St. George in sight.

You doing things for you is fine.

It’s when other people need to change their behaviors that it becomes a problem.

And tomatoes are “love apples”

And if my grandmother had wheels, she’d be a bike.

“Trump outsourced God” is a new sticker I’d love to see on a bumper

Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

Hunter S Thompson: Pack me into a cannon at the top of a 150 foot tower and fire my ass into the sky while Tambourine Man plays.

Counterpoint: Antibiotics yayyy

BOILED IN BRIGHT COPPER KETTLES, HELD WITH WARM WOOLEN MITTENS, AND TIED IN BROWN PAPER PACKAGES FOR EASY LUNCH DELIVERY

My ex suffers seizures. After years of bad doctors, he managed to see a neurological specialist who helped him manage his issues. His doctor informed his insurance that treatment was working and his symptoms had regressed - he even managed to earn his driver license back. His insurance took that as “he’s better now” and kicked him off. They sent him a bill for thousands of dollars that he had to pay before he could try to get back on his plan. He wasn’t able to afford his medication, nor his therapy, and his symptoms came back swinging. I still have a photo of his rejection letter somewhere that I keep as a reminder of how backwards and awful the insurance system is.

Walk barefoot, toughen up your feet. I prefer having thumbs and hands to paws.

Not gay, but I’m definitely the wobbler to my counterpart’s valet.