i cri errytime

on its 50th anniversary, let’s all remember that microsoft has been profiting massively off the genocide in palestine and has recently been targeted by BDS: https://noescapevg.com/xbox-has-been-added-to-the-bds-list-so-what-now/

i think that they probably had some sort of choice, but i imagine they also needed to work to live, right? very few places in the world let you have food and shelter for free, so i think there’s at least some of an argument that doing this stuff is forced in some way or another. plus, it might (have been sold as) paying better or being safer than the conditions they had previously

they’re hardly the only ones to work in unethical (or downright criminal, depending on how you view it) fields. and i’m not sure holding them in crowded, filthy conditions like this, where they’re spreading disease among each other and sharing something like one toilet to 80 people, makes amends for what they’ve done, or even makes the world a better place

i just think we can wish for justice while still acknowledging that people are deserving of some basic amenities for being people

… can a brother get a source on this??

it… works but it doesn’t work nearly as well as discord for gaming screen sharing, at least with the bit of testing i’ve done with mh wilds

no recommendations but i just hopped back on HotS and share your sentiment haha

so you would rather be perceived as a gay man than a straight woman?

when ppl pretend to be a gender online because of comfort, it seems to me that they feel more comfortable as that gender

i would do some real reflection about this. you talk about gender dysphoria but you don’t make any mention of gender euphoria. do you know what that is? it’s the other set of traits to look for when considering if you’re trans. one of those is feeling more comfortable in a given gender than your assigned gender at birth. another is feeling a sense of wholeness or happiness when picturing yourself with different sexual characteristics. sometimes that also presents as feeling sexually aroused when picturing yourself with those traits

why did you want to avoid being straight so badly?

i think online spaces are good places for exploring your gender identity and i don’t really think it was wrong or disingenuous. you feel like it was, because it’s pretend for you, but it’s offering you a real sense of warmth and comfort, so i don’t see an issue. obviously, please treat the trust that other people may grant you, given that label, with care. be a good person with it, and if they become close to you, consider explaining your situation to them, before misunderstandings can happen

identities are free to take and wear as you please. you don’t owe anyone dysphoria or a desire to transition to be trans, or to be that identity everywhere at all times. it’s just seems to me that you identify as a man/demiboy/etc online, and that’s cool

oh my fucking god i’m so pissed on your behalf, that’s such bullshit!!!

(also a rant, on a related but separate topic) holy FUCK along the same lines, i really hate it when people lurk in the parking lot waiting for someone to leave so they can park there! like wow, yeah, impede the flow of traffic and pressure the person leaving to hurry so YOU can have that space

i hate it so much, it makes navigating an already-packed grocery store even worse. the ppl at costco are SO bad about this 💀💀💀 just go park further away, you already have a minute long walk to the store, another minute won’t kill you!!!

this is my personal bar for whether someone is a good person or not :)

(exception for anyone who legitimately needs the closer parking spots but cannot get the disability parking spots for whatever reason. but they are a TINY minority of people)

maybe it’s little falin?

can we at least get a content warning on this shit

actually yk fuck it the mods here suck anyways, come join us at onehundrednintysix instead, i should have unsubbed here already

felt that brother

it’s good to have that additional context. it’s interesting to see how federation affects moderation and the issues that can present and how it aggravated the differences in moderation approaches

that said, even rescinding my argument about whether they were moderating, we’re still left with obvious ideological differences that would be bad to disastrous for the community in a place as active and ideologically unaligned as lemmy.world, nevermind the clear contempt that the mod team has shown for the community’s own preferences and safety

as an aside, thank you for the moderation work you do on this instance. while my interpretation that the c/196 mods were doing nothing was incorrect, it seems plain to me that your moderation style was still a good influence on the community (albeit at the cost of extra workload for you). it’s always good to see you around and i appreciate your presence and effort

thank you for providing the link to the source

it’s really incredible how the more i learn about the situation, the more the current mod team just seems like a complete mess

i’m from beehaw and i support our decision to defederate from lemmy.world, and honestly, i agree with ada’s moderating decisions. i don’t come to 196 to deal with people “just asking questions” or getting transphobic trolls coming in and CERTAINLY not cis people whining about how they don’t get their good boy ally points

especially if the post about you leaving 196 reports to languish unattended to is accurate (it’s from another user on this post who i can’t see while on beehaw, i’m guessing they’re from a defederated instance. they quoted ada, but i couldn’t find her comment as a source, so i don’t know if it’s real)

if that’s real, we barely know what your moderation style is, and i’ve been giving you false credit for ada’s good moderation

please see the comments for ada’s clarification about the moderation workload (tldr is that the mods are not native to blahaj.zone, so reports might be addressed on other instances but not blahaj.zone, frequently leaving ada to deal with them, aggravating their differences in moderation styles)

so we have reason to doubt where your moderating priorities are, you disagree with noted Good Judgement Admin ada, and you unilaterally decided both to move and where to move the community without consulting anyone first

from my vantage, you couldn’t even protect us on world if you wanted to, and it really doesn’t seem like you want to, either

i think the actual respectful thing to do at this point is to just step down. y’all have disrupted this community enough. there are mods who are interested in, and understand the values of, this community. values that you don’t seem to share

let them take over and have things return to normal. make a /c/196 on world if you want, it sounds like there won’t be a lot of content to moderate anyways

the lack of response to this is telling

yeah i’m tending to agree with this, especially as i’m skeptical that the culture will remain the same on lemmy.world. would be nice to have a fallback plan; and, indeed, this whole plan seems to have been orchestrated without consulting the community much at all

yes, there is something you can do about it! dr. will powers has made a pretty good hair restoration formula and you can get the formula online, take it to your doctor, and have them prescribe it for you. it’s probably not covered by insurance and is most likely expensive, though https://www.reddit.com/r/DrWillPowers/comments/rvc309/pharmacy_to_get_my_compounds_made_and_shipped_to/

the link is about where to get it made, but it also links to the formula itself

you should be able to check the subreddit itself for proof it works; he posted pics of someone with very bad hair loss, and the new regrowth of hair

note that the formula does contain minoxidil, which CAN be safely used around pets, as long as you take care to keep them from ingesting any of it

if i get around to talking about the science stuff, i’ll do it in a separate comment. but i don’t wanna promise anything because i’m really busy lately and honestly, it’s not something i’m super interested in getting into the nitty gritty over… sorry…😅 (it’s also why i took so long to respond, my apologies)

so basically, the point i was trying to make, is that it seems like your post was trying to educate (which is fine and a noble goal by itself), but also, if i read into a little more, that it seemed like it was a little more personal to you. and when it comes to persuasion, especially in places like this, where we’re pretty much here to have conversations with our fellow people, i think it’s nice to be able to speak your personal truth, which can easily get muddied in the goal of educating (well, really, you just have to be explicit about what parts of your post are educating, and what parts are your personal experience)

for example, you might have said, “i feel like it can be invalidating to hear that gender is a social construct. gender roles and expectations can be harmful at times, but it’s also possible to find a great sense of joy and belonging in them, especially as a transgender person who had to fight for that for a long time. it can also feel especially invalidating because, due to both science and my personal experience, i feel that my gender isn’t just a social construct, but an inherent part of my being that’s dearly important to me” obviously, it’s still a little sterile because… this isn’t my personal experience. but the cool thing about speaking your personal experience, about speaking your truth, is that it allows other people to know you a bit more. and, for you to know you a little more, since trying to explain something helps you understand it… and yourself is no exception :)

additionally, i think it would help with that sense that you need to bite your tongue about the subject. it’s OK to speak your truth, even in a meme sub. that’s the cool thing about spaces like these, i think, especially where they’re smaller and explicitly trans-friendly. that’s what they’re here for, for people like you and i to share our genuine, lived experience

fwiw, i did read the articles, but i think the issue with articles, or just citing someone else’s words, is that they’re not your words. that’s why i asked for elaboration in the first place. everyone has a unique way of viewing things, and i was curious what your views were, not the people you were citing (and i mean, it wasn’t PURELY curiosity, i was a little concerned too; but that’s the cool thing about asking for elaboration, you can do it if you’re curious or worried, haha)

just some other thoughts: i think it would have been cool to hear about your personal connection to the links you posted, as well. how you came across julia serano, what her work means to you, or if/how it helped you along your personal gender journey. i still have no idea if this is about something personal to you, or if it’s just something you’ve heard from other people, and are advocating for in their place. this isn’t to say that any of your points are less valid for not presenting your personal stance; but it confuses your motivation, and knowing the motivation you speak from helps me understand the broader point you want to make better

and then, idk, a little about me because i feel weird having written this much without sharing: i’m a transgender man who experienced very little dysphoria in his life. i feel a little insecure about being trans in this regard, so i tend to let others talk and share their experiences. i would honestly say that biological/hormonal dysphoria is the worst dysphoria i deal with, and i didn’t even realize it until i got my first testosterone shot because… how would i? so that, along with a lot of self work i’ve done to internalize that i’m a legitimate man, regardless of how others view me / how my body looks / how i view myself / etc etc etc, has led to me being very comfortable and confident in myself, which i feel like is (unfortunately) somewhat rare amongst us as transgender folks. plus, hormonal transition has been kind to me, so i rarely get misgendered… and in the event i do, people are super apologetic, like IMMEDIATELY, because… they see me as a man. so in a lot of ways, i feel like my experience being trans isn’t really universal, and it’s also very binary, so i try to listen more than i talk

all of this to say, while i might, individually, feel like my experience of my gender is very biological / innate… i don’t feel strongly about it, and in fact, i feel rather privileged about it, to be so confident and secure about my gender identity. and i don’t know that every trans person would describe their identity in the same way. maybe someone out there feels that their gender is a social construct, or they’re not sure where it comes from, or… any number of things that i might not be able to imagine. right? (i thought of a good example while washing dishes, actually; you know how a lot of trans girls say, “everyone knows girls have it easier”? when they’re still in egg mode?..) so my position is more or less that, regardless of what the actual basis you’re claiming (and that you don’t NEED to have a basis for it, at all), your gender identity is valid, however you claim it

and that uncertainty, and that belief, is the heart of the reason i pressed you about your point earlier, haha. so thank you for elaborating and putting my mind at ease, and allowing us to have this very pleasant conversation, instead