No do! That’s absolutely one of the most invigorating and thrilling little pleasures a man can have in a morning. What you absolutely do not do under any circumstances is have a shower wank with it, that way lies tears…

(Have I lowered the tone of the conversation again, I’ll show myself out)

You actually going for the single blade safety razor approach then? I think it’s great but can fully get why it isn’t for everyone, so I’d be very interested to hear how you get on if you do try it

It takes a little bit longer at first, but not really. Make sure the blade is sharp and replace it if not, keep tension on the skin, and let the weight of the razor do most of the work without putting extra pressure on. I’ve let others try mine (with a new blade for hygiene) and they’ve managed just find without slicing their face up.

I recommend a more traditional shaving soap over squirty foam, but that’s a lot more personal preference. I’d also strongly advise a good after shave moisturiser to reduce razor burn, a lot of cartridge style include a thin strip of it (which actually make shaving more difficult as it’s slippy), obviously a safety razor doesn’t have space for one so a little bit of manual cream application is advised, plus it smells nice.

If in doubt though, there’s dozens of articles and videos on it.

I personally use a combo of an Edwin Jagger safety razor made in Sheffield UK https://www.edwinjagger.co.uk/ and Derby Extra blades from Turkey https://shavelounge.co.uk/brand/derby/. The result is a comfortable shave at a very low cost

Rule 34 perhaps? Meaning there must be porn of a car infotainment system out there somewhere

What? No Penistone?